25 Hints You're Not Voting for Obama

I stole this one off of a bulletin board. I just thought it was too stinking funny not to post. After this I promise I am done for tonight.

25 Hints You're Not Voting for Obama [Peter Kirsanow]

Today's Rasmussen daily tracking poll has 80% of Democrats supporting Obama and 87% of Republicans supporting McCain. There are still a healthy number of undecideds. This conflicts with the stream of media reports that Obamacons, evangelicals, black conservatives and independents are flocking to Obama.

If you're an independent, moderate or conservative on the fence about whether to vote for McCain or Obama, here's a helpful guide:

It's unlikely you'll vote for Obama if you....

1. aren't a news anchor.
2. read the New York Times for pretty much the same reason the NSA monitors radio transmissions.
3. automatically conclude that the person laughing in the car next to you must be listening to Rush. Or maybe Obama off teleprompter.
4. dislocated your shoulder trying to explain Obama's position on Iraq to co-workers.
5. find autobiographies generally more interesting when the author has, you know, done something.
6. remember the Carter Administration.
7. would give a month's pay to play Jack Bauer's partner on 24.
8. increasingly agree with Mark Steyn that "almost everything [Obama] says is, well, nuts."
9. think it's relevant — despite what the sophisticates say — that several of Obama's mentors and associates have displayed a dislike for America or a disdain for Americans.
10. think it's relevant that several of McCain's mentors and associates are American heroes of historic magnitude.
11. think about 9/11 more than once a year.
12. have concluded that Larry the Cable Guy makes way more sense than Howard Dean.
13. feel a little safer during turbulence when your pilot is a calm "white haired dude."
14. thought about Hillary's 3:00 a.m. phone call ad when you first heard about Russian tanks in Georgia.
15. wonder why Obama felt it necessary to give a speech on patriotism.
16. get sorta creeped out by 200,000 Germans chanting "Obama! Obama!"
17. think the jury may still be out on Harvard Law School.
18. suspect "merci beaucoup" is French for "empty suit."
19. doubt that teleprompters are really magical dispensers of good ideas.
20. know in your gut that defiantly withstanding 4 1/2 years of torture trumps all of Obama's qualifications and accomplishments combined — regardless of what the elite pundits say.
21. repeatedly find yourself asking "Change to what?"
22. have ever used the term "pompous twit' in the same sentence with "Marx," "Marcuse," or "Sartre."
23. don't like being told what to do — especially by someone who hasn't done it.
24. really like ticking off the media, Hollywood, academics, and PC busybodies everywhere.
25. weren't born yesterday.

Score (# of descriptions that apply to you):

0— Go ahead, write in Dennis Kucinich
1—3 Obama may be your choice after all
4—5 You think Hillary got a raw deal and won't vote Obama
6—24 McCain's your man
25 It's OK to write in Reagan

Stitches

I'm sure you all knew this was coming. After all, The Z-monster hasn't managed to get stitches yet. (until now)

This morning The Z-monster took off upstairs (being naughty), and tripped and fell down. He split his head open on the baseboard on the landing. OUCH.

I cleaned it up and put ice(his head smelled like frozen peas all day) on it, and looked at it long and hard. After the last fiasco, I didn't want to spend time and money to be complimented on my bandaging skills. I decided that there was no way I could justify not taking him in. I also decided that they had better stitch him up- or else.

The gash was about an inch long, and was gaping open about half an inch wide. It's right on the back of Z's head, mostly towards the right side (the side he landed on). He also got some generic bruises and rug burn, but nothing serious.

At the ER (urgent care was closed), they took one look at him and fetched the suture tech (imagine that- doctors devoted to nothing but stitches!). So, The Z-monster is now the proud owner of a new teddy bear, and four stitches, all in a row.

Sorry, no graphic pictures of blood and gore. I was too distracted before, and too busy after. Perhaps I'll post some later. The Z-monster will be happy to pose.

I'm editing this to add a The Z-monster quote. On the way out to the van, I explained to The Z-monster that we were going to the Dr's to make his head better.

He said, "Oh, yes, Mommy, I need a bandaid."

To which I responded, "I'm pretty sure it will take more than just a bandaid."

The Z-monster thought about this, for a few seconds and responded cheerfully, "Oh, FIVE bandaids?"

Bandaids and kisses, people- the height of 3 year old first aid.

I'm editing this again (hmm, maybe I should just rewrite it altogether) to say THANK YOU MARCI for dropping everything to watch the girls while I took The Z-monster in. It would have been sheer torture dragging the whole zoo along with me.

Spaghettio the Yellow Horse

This is a story that The Z-monster, Didi, and I made up this evening. It is as long as The Z-monsters's attention span (when he has more exciting things to distract, like deep-dish homemade pizza). Everything The Z-Monster added will be in this color, everything Didi added will be in this color.

Once upon a time, it was a beautiful summer day, and the sun was shining. Spaghettio the Yellow Horse woke up and went outside. He breathed the fresh morning air, and thought, "I will go exploring in the big world today."

He looked around him, wondering which way he would go. In front of him was a beautiful blue ocean. Behind him was a deep magic forest. To his right was a tall, tall mountain, so tall that you couldn't see the top. To his left was a wide, flat desert, with snakes and lizards. Spaghettio decided to go back inside and get his Mommy.

"Mommy," he asked, "would you go exploring with me in the big, big world?"

Mommy, of course, was delighted. "I would love to explore with you, Spaghettio! Where are we going?"

"Outside, Mommy!" responded Spaghettio.

"Ahh, I see." said Mommy. "What should we bring exploring with us? Do we need food?"

"Yes, Mommy, pretzels and chips!"

"Hmm, Spaghettio, that doesn't sound very healthy. Do you think we should bring some fruit too?"

"No."

"Oh, ok. Do you think we should bring some veggies?"

"Oh, yes Mommy!" Spaghettio said with great glee. "Carrots! Broccoli! Corn! Peas! Tomatos!" Then, with great force, and a meaningful glance, he added, "NO Grean Beans!!"

"Wow, that sounds yummy! Do we need to bring anything else?" asked Mommy.

"Yes, Mommy," he replied. "A telescope!"

So, armed with a telescope and lots of snacks, Spaghettio and his Mommy set out to explore the great big world. They went out the door, and looked around. Spaghettio decided he wanted to climb the mountain! So up they went.

They climbed and climbed and climbed. They saw lots of trees. Then, they saw a great, big, waterfall. Spaghettio the Yellow Horse looked through his telescope, and saw a kitchen!

Spaghettio wanted to go look inside. "Shhhh, Mommy. Quiet!" he said. So they very quietly snuck up on the kitchen. Spaghettio looked inside and saw a great big frog.

"Hello!" said the frog, because she was a friendly frog. "My name is Daphne! This is my kitchen."

Everyone was hungry, so they had a snack. They made a yummy salad with the veggies, and ate chips and pretzels, and drank water with icecubes.

After the snack, they washed dishes in the kitchen, and Spaghettio helped! Then, they kept exploring up the mountain. They went higher and higher until there was snow on the mountain, and it was cold. So cold that everyone was shivering. All of the sudden they were at the top of the mountain. Spaghettio looked around with his telescope. He could see the whole wide world! He saw Ducky's nest! Down the mountain went Spaghettio the Yellow Horse, his Mommy, and Daphne the Frog, until they came to Ducky's house.

"Hi Ducky!" said Spaghettio. "Do you want to explore with us?"

"NO!" said Ducky, and stormed off.

The End

GI Appointment

You all are going to think that I do nothing but take my kiddos to the Dr! There are times I feel that way too.

The Z-Monster had his first GI appointment today. His first, and hopefully, his last. :) Well, ok, so I know there will be at least one other visit, because he will need to go in for a follow-up. BUT . . . I can dream.

Here's the scoop: (that is a pun, as you will see . . .) The Dr. DOES NOT really lean towards celiac, because the Z-monster's growth curve appears normal, and his iron hasn't ever been low. BUT, he is testing anyway, because of Z's cousin, and the diarreah. He is also testing for lactose intolerance and parasites (again).

Here's the punny part- I get to scoop his poop out of a bonnet for these lovely samples. ooooh joy.

He also had blood drawn for the tests. That was miserable. As soon as we walked into the lab, the Z-Monster started whimpering, "No, no poke me, please, no poke me!" He fought like crazy for the first stick, (sitting up) and despite the two nurses helping me hold him, he managed to twist his arm around, and blew the vein. SO now he has a nice big bruise on one elbow, and we got to try again.

I tried to explain to him that we HAD to do this, and that we would keep trying until we got it. I held him and hugged him while I told him I was sorry, but we were finding out what made his tummy troubles. I think it helped a little. He still begged and fought, but he seemed to be trying to be brave. It's tough, because he doesn't understand, and he didn't choose it. I just hope thats the last of the blood draws for a few years.

We can't expect any results from the tests for a while, of course, but we should know soon.

Allergist Appointment

Sorry I've been so negligent. I'm sure that everyone's been biting their nails for an update.

The Z-Monster had his allergist appointment on Tuesday, and it looks like he's home free in the allergy arena. YAY! Well, at least the allergist tested him for all the major food allergies. He came back negative on ALL of them.

Next week is the GI. Wish us luck!

Ironically, things in the bowel department have REALLY calmed down the last few weeks. It always seems to work out that way. Go figure.

Isn't it Fitting,

Considering a previous, that this post is an announcement that . . . Yup, you guessed it:







The Z-Monster had to go to the ER today. He was fooling around tipping his chair back on two legs (exactly the way he's been told not to five or six times a day since we got them) when he lost his balance and fell. He landed with his ear on the table, and tore open the skin behind his ear. I wasn't positive, but it looked like it might need stitches, so off we went to urgent care.

When we got there, the Dr. looked at his wound, proclaimed that it would need at least one stitch, gave the Z-monster some stickers, and sent us off to the ER. (I will refrain from expressing my feelings about THAT.)

At the ER, we signed in, and waited, got the Z-monster's vitals taken, and waited, were seen by the triage nurse, and waited, were sent back out to the waiting area, and waited, were taken back to the exam room, and waited, and FINALLY, here comes the Dr, who looks at the Z-monster's injury, states that it is healing really well, and doesn't need stitches at all. He does congratulate me on icing it down really well, and sends a nurse in to wash the wound.

So . . . all in all, a frustrating waste of time.

Ooops . . .

Oooops! I opened my mouth in RS, and I kind of overstepped the bounds. Eeek. I just meant to gently remind the sisters to report their VTing (I'm a VT supervisor), but I got emotional, and it turned into a lecture on the importance of reporting VTing, plus a gripe about how hard it is to keep doing my calling when next to NO ONE returns my phone calls, and I have to call the VT coordinator and report that out of 10 sisters, 1 partnership has reported, begrudgingly, when I cornered one sister at church.

Now I feel guilty for not being nicer about it. AAAACK! I feel like I just made everyone mad.

If you are greeted by name at Urgent Care . . .

You know you spend TOO MUCH TIME there.

Tonight as we were leaving Enrichment, the Z-monster dislocated his elbow, so you guessed it, off we went to the urgent care. At least it was a quick trip

Quiet Time

Is the new secret weapon in my arsenal. I know I'm not the first mommy to dream it up, but oh, is it a wondrous thing. The Z-monster is feeling too old for naps, but still needs them. So, rather than insisting on a nap, which would be certain to bring tantrums and tears, I offer him an alternative. He may choose 2 toys or books, which he may play with or read quietly on his bed during quiet time. If he is noisy, then he has to put them away and take a nap. So far, he has drifted off during every single quiet time so far. YAY!

Optimism

There is nothing like a 3 year old for optimism. Yesterday afternoon Didi was hungry, so I offered her a cheese stick for a snack.

The Z-monster (perpetually hungry) came running. "Cheese stick?!?!?" He inquired eagerly.

"Yes, cheese sticks." I replied, "Would you like one too?"

He paused to think about it for a moment, and I could see the cogs turning as he replied, "No, not cheese sticks. I want ice cream sticks!!!!!"

Cleanliness is next to . . .

Tonight as I was doing the final diaper change and putting the kids to bed, Didi requested (read: demanded loudly and insistently, but did say "please") a diaper wipe. I handed her one, and she proceeded to methodically wash the face and hands of every single one of her stuffed animals.

Apparently, they are messy eaters too.

One last Update

This should have been posted last night, but I'll post it now anyway.

As you have probably surmised, the Z-monster's blood culture still showed nothing at the 48 hour mark, so he is home free. He even got to go back to preschool today! He was very excited, because today is pool day. Aside from some explosive diapers thanks to his antibiotics (more explosive than usual, even for him) he is 100% back.

I want to thank everyone again for their prayers. I am sure it contributed to the Z-monster's speedy recovery.

In other news, we finally got a new pediatrician. YAY!!!!!!!!!! I am sooo excited! Hopefully we can finally get somewhere with the kids health.

Update again

As of 36 hours the culture shows no growth. Yay! So it looks like the Z-Monster is in the clear! We'll know for sure this evening. He is pretty much himself.

Didi stuck her finger in her ear and scratched her ear canal and it bled, which scared me, because of course all I could see was blood coming out of her ear. We took her back in to the Dr this morning too, and her ear drum is fine! Yay!

In more good news, the pediatrician said that we don't need to give Didi any more of the steroids for her hives.

An Update on the Z-Monster

I'm sorry it's so late, but I wanted to update tonight anyway.

The Z-Monster had his follow-up tonight down at Children's. He looks pretty good, he was his usual bouncy, talkative self, fought the Doc when he tried to check his throat and ears, flirted with the nurses, tried to get into the drawers and cupboards, you know, the usual.

The doctor saw a rash on the back of the Z-Monster's throat which wasn't there last night. Based on what he says is a very identifying rash, we have a working diagnosis: Herpangina. In other words, a cold. Even the purpura and petechiae could have been caused by it.

He does not think that Henoch-Schonlein Purpura is a concern, which is really nice, since that means no risk to kidneys! (yay)

Until we get the blood culture back we can't know definatively whether this is simply the virus, or there is something more serious afoot. Because of this, we are continuing the Z-Monster on injected antibiotics. He has another follow up (in his pediatrician's office, thank goodness) tomorrow, so I'll let you know the update.

Results from his blood culture are expected tomorrow evening.

Thankyou again for your thoughts and prayers.

Scary Urgent Care Trip

the Z-monster got a bite on Tuesday. I assume that it was from a mosquito, but I didn't see it happen. Somewhere between our front door and the van, he got bitten. I wasn't too worried about it, he wasn't scratching it, and it just seemed like an ordinary bite.

Saturday afternoon while I was feeding Baby, he came and sat down by me on the couch, and snuggled up. A few minutes later he fell asleep. At that point I started to notice that he felt warm, so I called Sven over to bring the thermometer, and to take Baby. We took his temp, it was 102F. I thought it might be a good idea to give him some Tylenol, so we did. That, of course, elicited a massive tantrum which ended with the Z-monster throwing up. After that, he threw up six more times last night. He was also VERY lethargic all afternoon and evening, kept falling asleep, laying down wherever he was, etc.

While the Z-monster was throwing up (into a miraculously convenient mop bucket) I noticed that his mosquito bite was VERY odd looking. It looked like a giant blood blister. I'd never seen or heard of such a thing happening, so I called the Triage line at Children's hospital. The nurse paged the doctor who told me to bring him in right away.

We took him in, and he was seen right away. The doctors noticed some smaller petechiae on his face that I hadn't even noticed before, although when I got home and looked at the picture I took, you can see the largest one, so they were probably there. He also began complaining of a headache while there.

The first doctor that saw us left and fetched another doctor, who promptly order blood tests done for infections and for clotting problems.

The preliminary test for infection came back positive, so after debating whether to admit him for observation, the doctor gave him two shots of antibiotics, and told us to bring him back in 24 hours for another round.

Today the Z-monster seems very much his usual self. He still says that his head hurts, and is also complaining that his joints hurt. Specifically, his shoulders, elbows, wrists, and knees. He requested a breakfast of oatmeal and eggs, but only ate a banana and a few crackers. So far today he hasn't eaten anything else, but he also hasn't thrown up again.

We go back to the hospital tonight for a follow-up, and more antibiotics while we wait for the results from the blood tests.

Last night I did some research, and I'm wondering if he might have Henoch-Schonlein Purpura, which would explain the rash. I plan to bring it up with the doctors.

Thank you to WP for taking the time out of his day, and away from his guests to assist Sven in giving the Z-monster a blessing. Thank you to all of our family who are joining in a fast for his health. Thank you to everyone for your prayers.

Well yesterday was not a flop, per se, but it didn't go as planned. It started out rushing to get the Z- monster off to school, but discovering that Didi has grown out of her tennis shoes, and since she lost a croc in a still undisclosed (to me) location, she had to go barefoot. So, after dropping the Z-monster and Daddy off at school (Sven goes to College, not pre-school, though :P), the girls and I headed to Old Navy, followed by Target, where we bought 4 pair of shoes (none for me though :(), a hat, and a handbag.

Then we headed back to pick up Sven, then the Z-monster, and then stopped in at his school to see about swapping him to AM preschool for the fall since it is going so well over the summer. Went home made/ate dinner, and saw Sven off to work. I put the kids in bed, and tried to get stuff done, and drifted off while sitting down to post.

When I woke up, I ran upstairs to keep Didi from sleeping to long, and LO and BEHOLD, she is covered in hives. She wasn't having any trouble breathing, so I figured, no biggie, just give her some benadryl and pay attention to her. I called the triage nurse to see how much benadryl to give her, and they insisted that she HAD TO BE SEEN. *sigh* whatever. Of course they didn't have an appointment available at the pediatrician's office. Sooo . . . off we went to urgent care. Sven had to take sick time to come bring me the van, we took the Z-monster and Baby to a friend's house at a moment's notice (see, I told you I have GREAT friends) while I took Sven back to work, and Didi to the urgent care.

At the Urgent Care things went smoothly, and Didi got right in, The Dr took a look at her hives and pronounced them the result of a topical allergy, not a food allergy. He prescribed her Zyrtec and we were on our way. Soooo . . . now we get to figure out what she is suddenly allergic to. Oooh Yay

And I hate to whine, and yes, I know that there are people who have it worse off than me, but I am JUST SO STINKING SICK OF SHOVING MEDICATION DOWN MY BABY GIRL'S THROAT. Ahh, I feel much better now.

In related (albeit indirectly) news, I finally got Zerin an appt with the GI specialist. It isn't until August, but YAY for progress!

Didi's First Celebrity Crush

Yup, you heard it. Didi, at the ripe old age of 18 mos has her first celebrity crush. Silly girl.

We tuned in to the Celtic Thunder concert on PBS earlier in the week. The kids all enjoyed the music, and even danced to some of it. It was lots of fun. But Didi was absolutely transfixed when ever the youngest member of the group, Damian McGinty, sang. So, not really a crush, but she has her daddy a little worried. ;)

Didi's Shoes

It is official. Didi can put her shoes on all by herself. I know this for sure, because I had to take her shoes off her feet and switch them around to the correct feet at least five times today.

Her favorite shoes are her hot pink crocs. Big surprise there. ;)

A Sandwich By Any Other Name

My kids are not sandwich people. They will eat the occasional PB&J, and they seem to like grilled cheese, usually. Your typical meat, cheese, lettuce, tomato, mayo and mustard sandwich, though. Not for a million bucks.

Hamburgers, of course, fall outside the category of sandwiches. Hamburgers are always gooooooood.

I went to an art show with some friends this morning, taking Baby, but leaving Sven in charge of the others. On the way home, I kept thinking, "I hope Sven fed the kids. Hmmm, I wonder what he would think to feed them." I shouldn't have doubted.

When I asked Sven what they had for lunch, he said, "Hamburgers!"

At this point, I was slightly boggled, since we are 100%, completely out of ground meat, and Sven was car-less.

"Yep," Sven continued, "Z-monster insisted he wanted a hamburger for lunch, so we got out sandwich rolls, and put ketchup, mustard, and mayo on them. Then we added pickles and onions. I washed up some lettuce and tomato, and added those. The Z-monster and Didi both wanted cheese on their hamburger, so I gave them a slice each. Then we closed them up, and the kids had their hamburgers."

It's all in what you call the food.

Monsterisims

The Z-monster said "hot sauce" yesterday. It was so very exciting. At Christmas time he wouldn't even have been able to say "hot". A month ago any "s" sound still would have been out of the question. But yesterday he just up and said it. YAY!

On another note, reading is starting to interfere with some of his vocabulary pronunciations. "Up", one of his very first words, is now being pronounced "uppy". This confused me at first, but I have deduced the reason. "up" is spelled: U.P. and therefore pronounced UH-PEE. (insert image of me smacking my forehead in frustration)

In the department of farm animals, a horse is a "whoosh", a sheep is a "whip", a pig is an "ohnk", and a cow is alternately a "dow" or a "moo".

I'd love to take some whoosh-back riding lessons.

An Update on Feeding Trains

In a recent discussion involving trains, we have learned that not only do trains enjoy eating eggs and apples, but also the occasional hamburger with cheese.

When asked directly, The Z-Monster did concede that trains did usually eat coal. Except for when they are at home, in bed.

Home at Last!

Well, we made it!

The rest of the vacation was wonderful. We had a lovely dinner for my grandparents at The Sea Ranch, a nice restaurant on South Padre Island. I learned that my kids love deep-fried onion blossoms, but not waffle fries. I also discovered that I like scallops, but only if they are grilled. AND, pan grilled is NOT the same as char-grilled. Pan-grilled is a fancy way of saying fried-blech. See? You learn something every day.

We went to Schlitterbahn Waterpark with the whole gang. The kids loved it! Didi went on the rapids three times with me, and was very enthusiastic about going again. The Z-Monster was very nervous about the whole situation, he doesn't like getting water in his face. He went on one ride with me, and then did all of them with Daddy. By the end of the day he had a total blast! Baby had to be content with a few trips under the fountains, since I was (justifiably, I hope) too nervous to take her in any deep water. She didn't seem to mind.

The trip home was waaaaay too long, but we made it . . . mostly. Poor Buzz Lightyear got lost somewhere along the way. The Z-Monster is heartbroken. We left a message with the airport lost and found, and we're hoping it will turn up.

We're back at home, only part of the way unpacked, have our cat back, and AAAACK! it's time for the return to real life.

Beached

Greetings all people reading this post from somewhere other than the beach. Didi and I just got back from building sand castles and playing in the water. As soon as Z-monster wakes up from his nap he'll head down with Sven, while the girls and I have a swimming lesson in the indoor heated pool. Mwa-ha-ha-ha.

Our trip here was pretty uneventful. On Saturday we flew to San Antonio, TX. The Z-monster was duly excited to ride an airplane, especially since he had a window seat. His excitement wore off about half an hour into the flight when he was "all done flying" and ready to go home. He was a little worried to look out the window and not see the ground below him. The Z-monster's favorite part of the airport experience was riding the moving walkways. He also loved riding the shuttle bus to meet Grandpa at the car rental office. We rented a couple of minivans and drove to Corpus Christi, TX, where we spent the night.

Sunday morning we joined the rest of the family for breakfast, and drove down to South Padre Island. After we checked in at our Condo's office, we moved our stuff in, and went to eat dinner with Aunt Nanna and her family. Uncle S made a massive quantity of delicious barbecued chicken, beef, and sausage, along with his home-grown corn and potato salad. YUMMY! Monday morning we went to the beach, and then went to Brownsville to the Zoo. It was altogether too hot, so we decided no more big outings in the mid-afternoon.

We've had lots of fun playing in the water and sand. Didi and The Z-monster especially enjoy playing in the pool having "swim lessons" with mommy and daddy. The Z-monster was initially afraid to come off the steps of the pool, but when he saw how much fun Didi was having he got brave. Didi is just a little daredevil in the swimming pool (as long as she's got Mommy or Daddy firmly in her grip)

More Updates Later!

The Proper Care and Feeding of Trains

The Z-Monster approached me today to talk about the train he could hear going by in the distance. The conversation went something like this:

Z: Mommy! A train! A train!
Me: Yes, I hear the train.
Z: The train is going away. Away to it's house.
Me: The train is going home?
Z: Yes. Home.
Me: Well, what will it do there?
Z: Eat!!!!
Me: It's going to eat? Wow. What do you think the train will eat?
Z: Eggs. Eggs and apples.
Me: Eggs and apples. How interesting.
Z: Train is going bye-bye to sleep. (pantomimes sleep and snoring)
Me: Wow, really? Where does the train sleep?
Z: In a bed, Mommy. With a blanket and pillow. (giving me the "DUH" look)
Me: Oh, I didn't know trains sleep in beds. Do train sleep with teddy bears?
Z: No, with Buzz Lightyear! (gasps and looks around) Buzz! Where is Buzz? (runs off)

Word of the Day

The Z-monster's new word of the day- REACH.

Didi's word of the day- UP. (not new, just frequent)

Twister!

Ok, just kidding . . . kind of.

Yesterday was an unforgettable Mother's Day. It's pretty hard to forget spending an hour in the chapel halls waiting for the all-clear.

I was in the nursery with Didi and The Z-monster (Baby was sleeping through Sven's Sunday School Class), when all the sudden we were charged with a stampeding herd of Mormon mommies coming to fetch their children. We couldn't hear the siren in the nursery, but there were funnel clouds being sighted all around, and some reported touchdowns in the area. It was nuts! Eventually things lightened up and we left, but even as we were leaving the sky over the city looked like someone took a giant spoon and stirred the clouds, it was beautiful, but very unusual.

I hope everyone had a good Mother's Day!

Happy Monday!

Buy a Shotgun

That is now a high priority item on Sven's to-do list. Why? Well, because Didi has discovered kisses.

I don't mean kisses as in, "Good night, sleep tight." No, I'm referring to the "get out of jail free" kind of kisses. Didi was in trouble for climbing on top of the dresser (again) and Sven was telling her that it was a no-no. She knew she was in trouble, and about to get put in time-out, so she changed her tune. Instead of her usual (cover her ears with her hands, sqeeze her eyes tightly shut, and shake her head "NO"), she gave an affectionate smile, leaned in, kissed her daddy, and gave him a hug. Whereupon she calmly walked off. She has since tried the same stunt with me three times.

Much to her distress, Mommy does not accept kisses as bail. So far, failure does not seem to have deterred her.

And now, for the nature segment

Squirrels are interesting creatures. The way they run, and jump, and twitch, their tails going up and down as they go catches the eye. Despite that, I've never payed them a great deal of attention.

The Z-monster, on the other hand, has been watching them with great scrutiny. He now has a pretty accurate impersonation of a squirrel in his repertoire of "things that make people laugh". He bounces around on all fours, and paws at things, twitches his "tail" in the air, and "eats" his mega blocks, then subsequently buries them in the couch. Didi now imitates Z imitating a squirrel, and Baby loves it. The two of them parade back and forth in front of her, while she giggles and coos at them.

No need to hire a clown for the birthday party, just call Z!

My Diaper Changer finally arrived!!!

I ordered one of these about 3 years ago. and it finally happened.

Yesterday as I was changing Baby's diaper, Didi sat down in my lap and started "helping" me. She cleaned Baby off with a wipe, and then put the diaper on her. Baby thought it was just wonderful to get all that attention from Didi, and Didi felt like such a big girl.It was soooo funny. Very little of what Didi used the wipe on was actually in the diaper area, and she worked very hard trying to get that diaper to stay on without the velcro. Baby just adores her big sister, so it's great to see Didi giving her some real attention instead of just jealousy.

So now, with Didi to change diapers, and the Z-monster to fetch and dump, wow, I could almost retire!

My Littlest Princess

Well, I've been telling every one about how Baby is growing so much- and it is wonderful. However, according to her pediatrician, she hasn't grown all that much. She weighs 13 lbs 7 oz, and measured in at a petite 23 inches long. She is officially in the 1% percentile. That's down from 5% at her last checkup. She is growing, and healthy, and doing all those things babies her age should be doing, so the Dr. isn't worried. She's just . . . well, little.

I have been worried about the fact that Baby keeps spitting up/gagging on her rice cereal. It turns out that she just wants some better food. I can't say that I blame her. She smells chili or spaghetti and gets . . . rice??? So we started her on peas today. Those were a BIG HIT. No spitting up, or gagging, or further fussing. Just ate them right up.

Tongues are amazing pieces of muscle, and there is a lot that goes into learning how to use them. Today at the dinner table, Didi was experimenting with her tongue, and the different noises she could make by sticking it in different places (mostly) in her mouth. la, wah, da, etc. Bby was watching this, and during her post-dinner diaper change, started sticking her tongue out at me, and going off in a miniature fit of giggles. Thank you, Didi.